Entries Tagged as 'Motivation'

Saturday Hanukkah

I believe we’ve located the menorah. It’s been in our storage unit since we moved. We will probably light all the candles on the last night. I’ve been told, ‘You’re a good Jew.” This was at a time when I was at a gathering at my sister’s house. A friend of hers was having some difficulty with her digital camera, so I sprung into action. Afterwards, she said to me,”You’re a good Jew.” I think she was some high-ranking official at my sister’s synagogue. I was just helping someone out, and there she was slapping a label on it. When we finally get around to lighting the candles, I’ll be doing it more for the enjoyment of the children and my wife than anything else. If that makes me a good Jew, so be it. I’m just trying to celebrate.

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Happy 2nd, Ava Part 2

Here’s a follow-up to the birthday festivities…

[youtube kbxpBiD5Ays]

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Creativity Begins Here

The dream gift was originally intended for Ava: safety scissors shaped like a cute, friendly, innocuous beast which she could use for her endless arts-and-crafts projects, such as cutting up important government documents, credit card bills, bank notifications, etc. while her parents would guzzle cheap rot-gut whiskey and whine and laugh about the great old times when worry would kill you quicker than anything. Nikki took Gia out into the world on a quest for such treasure as would bring the light of glee into the eyes of our now-two-year-old, a quest which would end up in the bowels of holiday weekend shopping hell.

The beacon appeared towards the end of the excursion, and it is pictured here in all its packaged brilliance. What better offering to your innocent daughter than a friendly, inoffensively colored mallard to assist you with your paper shredding, chopping and older sister-threatening daily chores, particularly when it boasts ‘Shark Sounds when you cut!’ and one can only hope ‘Here’s to Swimmin’ with Bowed-Legged Women!’

Duck Scissors Front of Package Duck Scissors Back of Package

The question remains, as we are compelled to ‘Also look for the Duck Scissors’ on the rear of the packaging, is whether the Shark Scissors quack. I might have to hunt down a pair.

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Happy 2nd, Ava

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Baby Number Three

So we’ve gone and done it. I should say, my wife did it, for the third time, this past Halloween. It was once again an awe-inspiring experience participating in the delivery of our third daughter.

Our Halloween Baby

There’s an interesting video over here at CNN which caught my attention. It’s titled “Little Baby, Big Stress”. It has some interesting suggestions on how to manage stress once a baby is born.

One particularly amusing concept is scheduling a date once a week with your spouse. It might be nice to live in some parallel universe where there were people nearby whom we could trust to watch our children so we could indulge in such activities. As it stands, we’re more or less on our own. We did have some family in town for a couple of weeks, during which time the offer was extended for us to go out to dinner or something, just the two of us. We opted to stay home and relax. At least, that was the plan. As for me, I was physically incapable of relaxing, sleeping, eating, or thinking coherently. When the pediatrician gave us an A-plus, said baby’s doing great and that he had no advice for us since we seemed to be doing everything right, I was speechless. Had I attempted to say anything, it would probably have been unintelligible nonsense, my parenting privileges would no doubt have been stripped from me immediately, and my wife and baby would have been sent home with a police escort. It would have been a strait jacket for yours truly.

We nearly boycotted Thanksgiving, but I decided to take advantage of the fact that, dare I say it, I was beginning to feel human again. So I cooked a turkey, complete with stuffing, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, the works. I stared at our third perfect little girl. I reminded myself of how lucky we are. My wife reminded me of how lucky we are. I think I’m even starting to feel lucky. It’s one thing to intellectualize it or hear it said over and over, but it’s another thing entirely to feel it. I admit that I’m very selfish that way. I have this need to feel good about things, to enjoy life, to have a good time whenever and wherever possible. I don’t want my daughters seeing their father reduced to a neurotic mess of a human being and thinking that’s what they have to look forward to when they get older and accumulate responsibilities.

Life is good right now, despite the string of recent and current events which are providing endless entertainment for my family, friends and coworkers.

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Relocation

Just up and relocated the entire family to the Capital District. That would be the region surrounding the capitol of New York State. Most non-New Yorkers have no clue as to what that means. Most non-New Yorkers, including many who have visited the state, consider New York to encompass the four block radius surrounding St. Mark’s Place in Greenwich Village. That would be located on Manhattan Island. That’s right, Manhattan is an island. So is Long Island. Queens is a borough. New York City has five of them (boroughs, that is). Queens, and Brooklyn (another borough) for that matter, both are part of Long Island, though neither Queens-ites nor Brooklynites seem to grasp or admit that. I grew up in Queens, which is not necessarily relevant, depending on who happens to be reading this.

Bedroom WindowNow we’re in a renovated textile mill, supposedly the largest textile mill in the world, which has been converted into loft apartments. My one-way commute has been reduced from 40 miles to 4.5 miles. The kids are loving it so far. The architecture around here is fascinating. Supposedly, real estate around these parts hasn’t suffered quite as much of a blow as elsewhere. Still, there are those back on Long Island who rolled their eyes at me when I told them we were moving… UPSTATE. We are now ‘upstaters.’ The key phrases regarding Upstate New York vs. ‘Downstate’ are “your money will go so much farther,” “such an easier pace,” and “what about when it snows?” Right now we’ll just go ahead and enjoy the autumn weather.

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Parents Orientation

Gia starts preschool officially in nine days. One week from today, she begins her ‘Phase-In,’ and that same night, there’s a ‘Parents Orientation.’ This is one more affirmation that I am really a parent. I wonder how many other parents at this shindig will feel as disoriented as I feel. I still haven’t come to grips with the fact that I have offspring. In my professional life, I grapple with the feeling that I’ll be discovered as some kind of impostor, that someone someday soon will wake up and realize that I know absolutely nothing. I’ve expressed this to some of my associates, and happily, they’ve laughed at me, so for now, the snow job continues. What will it be like when I’m surrounded by a bunch of other parents, at a very parent-focused event? I’ve been around parents before. I even had parents myself. What’s the story here? Why the apprehension? I don’t even have long hair any more, so there’s even less reason for people to look at me like I’m some kind of freak. Really, I’m looking forward to the experience. It’s all part of my big experiment in adulthood. I’m trying to remain very selective with it though. Wouldn’t want to be an adult all the time. What a waste of time that would be. I can see how my kids look at me when I even try. They know better, much better. They are both much wiser than I ever was.

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How to Pay to Sleep on the Job

I’ve been pushing the siesta concept for years. Looks like these people are capitalizing on it. (Goodbye, yet another window of entrepreneurial opportunity for yours truly.) Their website even has a nifty little graph which supposedly illustrates how ‘Cognitive Performance Deteriorates Without Naps.’

Hypnotic Cognitive Performance Graph

The graph is nifty, I think, because at first glance, I have no idea what it’s showing me. I’ve even looked at it two or three times. Still I have no clue. I see a couple of lines and numbers and dots there, and there’s some kind of footnote saying where these statistics came from. There’s even Sara Mednick, I mean DOCTOR Sara Mednick, who has a PhD or something from some prestigious college somewhere, who supposedly did studies, and I guess she looks nice enough based on her picture, and the website people say her college was prestigious, and I’m sure her parents or someone was proud when she got that PhD from, oh wait, HARVARD, and I’m getting dizzy because I’m so delirious from not having a nap today that their nifty graph is making me stare into it, deeper, deeper, your eyes are getting sleepy, deeper, deeper, thank you Sara Mednick, thank you so much for spending time and lots of money scientifically researching something that the rest of the world didn’t need a college to tell them, and now things are coming around full circle, just like doctors prescribing Yoga, that’s it, I’m going back to school to study… ummm… ZZZZZZZZZZZ

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Happy 40th Birthday

Happy 40th Birthday

Turned 40 last week. Today’s 40 is yesterday’s 20, or something like that. I feel pretty good aside from the general malaise, which is also a good thing, I think. Self reflection is inevitable at this point. Maybe it’s not inevitable, but here it is. I’m reflecting. Crain’s NY Business Magazine, which I often read because it’s left on the bathroom floor at work, has its “Forty Under 40″ piece listing those wildly successful “Under 40″ people who, we would assume, have managed to make boatloads of money and earned the respect of the community and gobbled up millions of acres of prime real estate and have the words “Chief” and “Officer” in their titles. I’ll have to put Made it into the Crain’s ‘Forty Under 40′ on my list of things I didn’t do before I was 40. Thankfully, it wasn’t one of my life’s ambitions. On the other list, however, I’m finding there are some truly great things. Here they are, in no particular order:

  • Got married
  • Became a dad… TWICE!!
  • Bought my first house
  • Got a real estate license
  • Got a college degree
  • Took the LSAT
  • Played music onstage

OK, so it’s not exactly a comprehensive list, but it’ll have to do for now. I’ve got to go make plans. There’s plenty to do before I turn… 40 1/2.

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How to Learn to Write and Achieve Greater Success

I came across a good article here on improving speaking skills. It struck a chord with me, partly because I’m plagued by some people who have awful presentation skills. If I hear one more “you know,” they might have to cart me away in a straitjacket.

The article does, however, resonate with me primarily because it reminds me of my days as a writing tutor at the local community college. After I graduated with my B.A. in English, I managed to get this part-time gig in the ‘Writing Center.’ That’s the place they sent students who couldn’t write. By the time they showed up, the Writing Center was about the last place any of them wanted to be. They were utterly convinced that writing was not something they could ever do. I knew that was nonsense. One student in particular, this nice Israeli kid, couldn’t even get graded. I read some samples, and I could see why. His writing barely sounded like a first grade English primer. He could, however, talk. Boy, could he ever talk. He was, in fact, very eloquent. He had a thick accent, but he spoke better English than most Americans. I told him to go home and record himself talking, preferably about the subject the professor was instructing him to write about, then simply transcribe his own words. Shortly thereafter, he received an A.

The solution seemed so simple. Perhaps it was because I had done quite a bit of recording as a musician, so the concept came naturally to me. The bottom line was that it worked. I witnessed someone go from being ungradable to getting straight A’s (in writing, at least).

To this day, it amazes me when people who are perfectly capable of carrying on a conversation insist that they cannot write. Somewhere along the line, they lost the ability to make the connection between speaking and writing. I’ve read that the same can be said for people who, like myself, claim they cannot draw. They haven’t made the connection between drawing and seeing. I’m still working on that one. Whatever the case may be, writing is a crucial skill. It gets respect. People acknowledge it. It’s what got me through college without having to study very hard, especially when it came to subjects I had little or no interest in. The fact that I was able to put sentences together apparently made all the difference to my professors, including my English professors. I always had a really hard time with assigned reading. I read plenty, but never what I was told to read. I’d read some of the Cliff’s Notes, write a paper on whatever book, get a good grade, then go to the library and take out something that actually interested me. Point is, good writing even fooled my English teachers. That should tell you something. If you can speak and write well, people assume you know what you’re talking about. They want to believe that, so they will believe that, until you do something drastic to prove them wrong. Even then, they might still refuse to believe any differently. The odds are in your favor if you take the time to develop your writing skills. If you can speak, you’re already almost there.

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